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Choosing a kick scooter for a 2000 mile journey around Italy, was a bit like choosing a car or I guess a husband . I wanted him to be pretty, reliable, tidy, compact, have a GSOH, brown hair, blue eyes.

With no idea about kick scooters, otherwise than wanting to push people over when they were on them…


I set off on a journey of dates and phone conversations in search of my one true scooter love.

I skyped with a dude in NYC who was apparently planning a big scooter but in fact scooted to work.

I perved on two extreme scooter dudes, both of whom don’t speak English.

I contacted all the big scooter brands and discussed wheel diameter, how much weight they could hold, distance they could cover.

I got told I was stupid. Crazy. Odd. Nuts. Really stupid.


I spoke to people around the world who all tried to help with the scooter selection process.

But there was no one that really knew about long distance kick scooting.

No one could tell me whether a kick scooter could cover 2000 miles. Especially with kit on my back. And a giant boob.

All I knew is that I wanted to look like this guy –


After weeks of searching, skyping, speaking and slurring all things scooter shaped, two e-mails popped up on the same day. Two scooter companies (including my top choice) were interested in my journey and keen to find out more. You know what they say… Men are like buses. Well two came along and they didn’t look like this –


Meet my scooter sponsor…

Swifty Scooters.

Big beautiful wheels. Cool brand. Fold away style. Cracking accessories. I am in love. They caught my attention from the minute I found them and to my joy offered me a massive discount on their spectacular wheels.

As I type, the scooter is on its way to me now. Hero blue. Purple rims. It’s my hero. Watch this space for more info on the brand. But next, it needs a name…


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