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Say happy birthday to Guy Fawkes. Because this year is the 406th Bonfire Night. Now that’s old. But whatever your age, this is the perfect time to get yourself out and about in our capital and find yourself a snog. Oh yes. It’s that time again. Snog time. And with the amount of events kicking about over the next week, this is an opportunity that’s too good to miss. So read on and hopefully you won’t be reading alone this Sunday night…

First up is the Day of the Dead itself – Wednesday 31st October. The day is here. So if you haven’t got anything spooktastic to do tonight, then maybe some of these will frighten the life into you rather than out of you…

* If your date is a bit trendy and you really want to freak her out, then take her to the Old Vic Tunnels. You’ve probably been there/ heard of them, but if you haven’t, they are the ideal graveyard destination. Dark, dingy and downright spooky. Now, in Mexico, Day of the Dead is a time where familes gather to remember the lives of their ancestors and basically all the dead come and say hi and it’s mean to be one big party. Rodrigo y Gabriela will be headlining the Day of the Dead festival of food, art, music and film. If you can escape work for a sneaky snog in the day (which is always a bit more high risk), then you will find the tunnels filled with photography and a temporary street kitchen, tequila and Mezcalaria bar. I’d snog someone if they took me here. It is dark mind, so make sure you lunge the right person. Munters always look better in the dark. Especially after tequila.


* If your date is all about the food, then check out Ben’s Canteen Halloween. Tuck into ‘Suicide Wings’ and ‘Zombie Clothes stew’. It sounds like a right treat?! But with Sipsmith involved, you know you can wash it all down with their good old ‘Swamp Water’. Who can say no to an event that involves Gelupo, Sipsmith and the Rib Man. It’s basically food porn.


* Ever imagined what 2000 coffins look like, well head to the Paradise in Kensal Green and you will be shown just that. For a tenner, this is an outing for the thick skinned, with a tour around Kensal Green cemetery. If you make it back alive, you will get to enjoy a Babushka vodka cocktail and some pumpkin, zombie bone marrow soup. Maybe this can be a sly ploy to get your bird to cling onto you. Just make sure she isn’t so scared she wets herself.


* If your date is a bit of a booze hound, then challenge him/ her to win the ‘favourite rockstar’ fancy dress competition at Aces & Eights tonight. If you win you get a free keg of beer. How American of them. £3 entry. This is perfect for a cheap date who is happy with Jack Daniels, beer and going all out in fancy dress.


* If you’ve planned a date but don’t really want to talk to them, then why not check out a movie in honour of the horror and gore. For only £4 you can watch Beetlejuice AND Hocus Pocus and slurp on beetlejuice punch. This is all going down at the Water Poet. What a perfect place to feel up your date without having to talk to her. Bonus. You could even put your willy in the popcorn box if you were getting desperate. It might work?!


 Thursday 1st November is a bit of a random day. Sandwiched in the middle of two big holidays. But then again it is Thursday night so of course there are bits and bobs going on. Why not swerve your regular hangout and take someone special to one of the following. You never know what might happen…

* Want to take your bird on a mammoth adventure? Well why not take her to Ice Age LIVE in the Wembley Arena? This is a date for a certain kind of girl but who wouldn’t want to see this. I would snog someone if they took me here. But then my ideal date is a MacDonalds and a car wash. I know this has nothing to do with Halloween or Bonfire Night but you can go see this over the weekend and I’m afraid it was too good to leave off the list.


* Feel like a night out but want to stick to the vibe of Halloween? Well PING in Earls Court not only has ping pong tables to keep you entertained but is also turning the joint into a labyrinth of ghosts, gouls and all things that go bump in the night. So grab your fancy dress and hit the dance floor. After kicking your dates ass. A bit of competitive is always perfect flirting ground.


Friday 2nd – Monday 5th November is officially Bonfire weekend and there is a whole host of things going bang! You could just find a high point and stand there and wait for some colourful lights and sparklers, but here’s a few of my favourites…

Friday 2nd November

* Everyone loves Legoland. Ok maybe only some people do. But if your date is a lego fan, then why not watch the fireworks in a different setting. Legoland is putting on a display this weekend. And it means you can sneak off and play with each others bits… of lego if you get bored.


 * If you feel a bit like Bond then take your date to the Bishops Park fireworks which is set to have a Skyfall theme in honour of all things James. It’s a little park but with a cracking fireworks display. Sparklers, toffee apples, hugs needed. Guaranteed snogs.

* Last week I saw a group of friends dressed as the Ghostbusters. And boy did they look hot. In a weird, alien killing way. Well The Mayor of Scaredy Cat Town has cottoned onto this and is putting on a night in honour for the 80s flick. Grab your alien busting pack and head down for drinks and mega burgers. All girls love a hero, so why not jump in front of her, protect her from an alien and then lean in for the congratulatory kiss. Job done.


It’s all about fireworks. Choose your date. Work out a day. Take your pick –

Saturday 3rd November

* Battersea Park fireworks

* Blackheath fireworks

* Thorpe Park fireworks

Sunday 4th November

* Richmond fireworks

Monday 5th November

* Crystal Palace fireworks

* Wimbledon fireworks

* Clapham Common fireworks

It’s cold outside. You are oh-ing and ah-ing at the fireworks, Catherine wheels, sparklers, mulled wine… and each other. It’s the perfect date to huddle close and accidently lunge. So pick your outings, choose your bird and get snogging. I hope that my guide will mean there aren’t just fireworks in the sky this weekend…