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Traffic Lights hasn’t been so successful this week.  It approached a number of Corner Shop owners and invited them to take part in our delightful questionnaire.  Eyeing me beadily, they looked terrified – then sent me on my way with cries of ‘too much to do!’, ‘another time’ and plain ‘NO’.

Might Alf answer our questionnaire?

I’m trying to think of ways to romance them into taking part.  In the good old days, a mixed tape would do the trick.  So I’m bringing back this long-lost, much loved, archaic wooing tool and preparing a playlist.  This playlist:

Cornershop                          Brimful of Asha
Kings of Leon                       Milk
Gene Kelly                           Good Morning!
Cast of Oliver                       Food Glorious Food
Oasis                                  Cigarettes and Alcohol
The Rolling Stones               Brown Sugar
Sammy Davis Jnr                 The Candy Man
The Beatles                          Mean Mr Mustard
Larry Groce                          Junk Food Junkie
Las Ketchup                         The Ketchup Song
Shanks and Bigfoot               Sweet like chocolate
Bow Wow Wow                     I want candy
Danny Kaye                          I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts
Labelle                                 Lady Marmalade
Levi Roots                            Reggae Reggae sauce song
Monty Python                       Spam song
The Fat Boys                        All you can eat
Cast of Sweeney Todd           The worst pies in London

And finally, as an ironic twist for the B side (since we all know they never close): Dolly Parton – 9 to 5

Will keep you posted on progress.

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